grrr

As soon as my own father had stopped showing interest in my development i clang to God for his comfort, guidance and strenght. God and i had a very intimate relationship, I HEARD God and he had alwasy spoke so true to me.

I first noticed my dad "not giving a shit" when i would ask him questions i would have about electronics or computers, something my dad had similar interests in, and he would reply "I don't know man, your more into that stuff than me, you've surpassed my knowledge." and instead of walking beside me, taking me to a library, spending time with me to learn with me he "shunned" me off to my own room to play with my theories and grow on my own.

I am at a time in my life where i feel like god is doing the same. I have a question and i bring it to god, and i dont get the comfort from my child hood, maybe im not asking directly enough maybe im not trying hard enough. Im pretty sure ive given my dad more chances than God, but i feel as thou i shouldn't have to beg to get results from god.

maybe he is speaking to me, well id have to say he IS speaking to me about other things, suppose i should be looking into them first, this is a public acknowledgment that i hear his voice, i desire something differnt than the answers i am getting, and i hope to see myself change to listen to his words, and document those changes aswell, i will start anew journy to support his word, and we will hope that it will remain a good word as i have always trusted.



"Gather my broken heart, fragments to a whole... Let mine be a merry, all-receiving heart, but make it a whole, with light in every part"